I listened to "God Be Merciful to Me" at least 3 times today. Have you heard it? It's a hymn that was written from Psalm 51 I think. It is about our sin and God's grace. I was feeling very guilty today for a sin that I have already confessed and that has been forgiven by all parties.
I remembered something a friend told me as I listend to that song and my thoughts whirled around in my head...If I don't forgive myself for things that Christ has paid for, then I am robbing the Lord of His glory. Because I am trusting more in myself than on the Lord and His faithfulness.
It's so easy to say that we believe, but when it comes to things that we don't think He should forgive us for, because we can't forgive ourselves, it is so easy to fall back on our own ideas of things and forget how truly amazing His grace is.
Lyrics to God Be Merciful to Me
God be merciful to me, on Thy grace I rest my plea
Plenteous in compassion Thou, Blot out my transgressions now
Wash me, make me pure within, Cleanse, oh, cleanse me from my sin
My transgressions I confess, Grief and guilt my soul oppress
I have sinned against Thy grace, And provoked Thee to Thy face
I confess Thy judgment just, Speechless, I, Thy mercy trust
I am evil born in sin, Thou desirest truth within
Thou alone my Savior art, Teach Thy wisdom to my heart
Make me pure, Thy grace bestow, Wash me whiter than the snow
Gracious God, my heart renew, Make my spirit right and true
Thy salvation's joy impart, Steadfast make my willing heart
Broken, humbled to the dust, By Thy wrath and judgment just
Let my contrite heart rejoice, And in gladness hear Thy voice
From my sins, oh, hide Thy face, Blot them out in boundless grace
4.18.2009
4.07.2009
Warrior of the Year Update #2
Well, Saturday morning got off to an early start at the Grenade Assault Course. Todd went first and did really well. It was an awesome course, with barricades and different challenges. I actually wanted to get out there myself!
We got to talk for a few minutes and he told me about the Land Nav courses. He said that he tied for first in the day time and won the night Land Nav course.
After everyone finished the Grenade Course, we walked over to a HUGE Confidence Course. This thing was at least three football fields in length and breadth. There were a lot of challenges they had to tackle. Several of them were very high in the air; all of them looked very difficult. I was a little queasy as I watched Todd on some of these, just because I was nervous for him. The goal for this was just to finish all the obstacles successfully. Which Todd did; however, on one of them he took a pretty bad fall and hit his shoulder really hard. He caught himself and finished everything. This was towards the beginning of the course…he did finish it, but after the adrenaline wore off, he realized that his fall was worse than he thought.
The Medics took a look at him and sent him to the Emergency Room at the hospital. I went with him and after a few hours, we emerged with his arm in a sling, some STRONG pain medications, and the verdict of torn shoulder muscles. They recommended that he didn’t complete the competition for medical reasons, and he was in so much pain, that I don’t think he cared at the time.
We found out on Sunday morning that he was ahead by a very wide margin. He could’ve missed an entire competition and still been able to win. This was disappointing, but Todd says that he has no regrets. It was an amazing experience and we plan to go back and win it all next year.
The comradory that I witnessed in the soldiers was very moving. Hearing them cheer each other on and help each other through these grueling tasks was really something. The purpose was to push the soldiers to their limits, physically and mentally, and even in these harsh conditions, those soldiers shined. I was so proud that Todd was a part of this competition and was competing against such impressive soldiers. It was a bonus that he was winning!
Todd is feeling a little better today. He still doesn’t have full use of his arm, and the doctor recommended physical therapy after they do an MRI, but overall, he is doing well and is back to school.
Thank you all so much for your prayers and support. It means so much to us both!
Love, Danielle
(I'll add more photos soon!)
We got to talk for a few minutes and he told me about the Land Nav courses. He said that he tied for first in the day time and won the night Land Nav course.
After everyone finished the Grenade Course, we walked over to a HUGE Confidence Course. This thing was at least three football fields in length and breadth. There were a lot of challenges they had to tackle. Several of them were very high in the air; all of them looked very difficult. I was a little queasy as I watched Todd on some of these, just because I was nervous for him. The goal for this was just to finish all the obstacles successfully. Which Todd did; however, on one of them he took a pretty bad fall and hit his shoulder really hard. He caught himself and finished everything. This was towards the beginning of the course…he did finish it, but after the adrenaline wore off, he realized that his fall was worse than he thought.
The Medics took a look at him and sent him to the Emergency Room at the hospital. I went with him and after a few hours, we emerged with his arm in a sling, some STRONG pain medications, and the verdict of torn shoulder muscles. They recommended that he didn’t complete the competition for medical reasons, and he was in so much pain, that I don’t think he cared at the time.
We found out on Sunday morning that he was ahead by a very wide margin. He could’ve missed an entire competition and still been able to win. This was disappointing, but Todd says that he has no regrets. It was an amazing experience and we plan to go back and win it all next year.
The comradory that I witnessed in the soldiers was very moving. Hearing them cheer each other on and help each other through these grueling tasks was really something. The purpose was to push the soldiers to their limits, physically and mentally, and even in these harsh conditions, those soldiers shined. I was so proud that Todd was a part of this competition and was competing against such impressive soldiers. It was a bonus that he was winning!
Todd is feeling a little better today. He still doesn’t have full use of his arm, and the doctor recommended physical therapy after they do an MRI, but overall, he is doing well and is back to school.
Thank you all so much for your prayers and support. It means so much to us both!
Love, Danielle
(I'll add more photos soon!)
4.03.2009
Warrior of the Year Update #1
Being an army wife is a new experience for me!
Todd and I are in Des Moines, IA for the Warrior of the Year competition. Todd has already won for our region, but now he is competing against soldiers from Nebraska, Kansas, and Minnesota. He is one of four sergeants competing. There are others here as well, but the only ones he is being judged against are those three.
We got here yesterday afternoon and checked in. Met the soldiers and commanding officers. Ate some Iowa Chops (they made a big deal of those pork chops, but I didn't think they tasted any different than Oklahoma Chops), and then Todd had to take a 25 question test and write an essay. He felt like he did really well.
I am the only family member that came! We didn't find out until we arrived that Todd has to stay in the barracks with the other soldiers. We had a reservation for a apartment on base, but they asked if I wanted to stay with the female soldiers in the barracks because it was free!! Yikes! I have NEVER liked community showers...and I can guarantee that I NEVER will. NO BARRACKS FOR ME!
When we found that I didn't get to stay with Todd, I felt a little tear well up, but I told myself that I had to be tough because I was surrounded by soldiers. And I was tough. I felt proud of my secret victory.
This morning began at 0430 for the soldiers. I met them at the area for PT training at 0530. They did the push up and sit up physical fitness test and Todd won both of them I think. I know he for sure won the push ups. He had to do as many as he could in 2 minutes. He did 87 push ups and 79 sit-ups.
After that they had a 2 mile run. He has been training for this and has run that in less than 12 minutes, but today it was 31 degrees and he ran it in about 13 minutes. He came in third for that. He was a little disappointed, but it was FREEZING and he has a pretty bad chest cold on top of that. So, I was still proud!
At 1030 we went out to the rifle range where they had to qualify with M16s. He told me he did okay, but I showed his paper to some of the people out there and they said that he did GREAT. He's so modest.
After that, the boys went to chow and I had to say goodbye for the day. They were going to do a DAY/NIGHT Land Nav course and I couldn't go watch that part. =( It sounded like fun though!
I probably won't see Todd again until tomorrow. At first I thought that I shouldn't have come, but I have had so many soldiers tell me how much it means to them to have family members there and Todd has thanked me time and time again for coming...I just told him that someday, when he is a CRNA he's just going to get to make it up by taking me on a great vacation to Hawaii or Europe. ;)
Tomorrow begins at 0700 at the Confidence Course where they will be tested mentally and physically. If you think of it, please pray for Todd this weekend. Primarily for his safety and health!
Thanks!!
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